Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Sept. 30, 2015 - Video: A gay and white psychotherapist acknowledges his racism to expel it

Sept. 30, 2015: Instinct - Video: Psychotherapist Matthew Dempsey: "I'm Gay, White & Racist" | Instinct

Sept. 30, 2015 - Millions around the globe need HIV treatment, World Health Organization reports

Sept. 30, 2015 - New York Times: Millions More Need H.I.V. Treatment, W.H.O. Says - The New York Times

Sept. 30, 2015 - One man, alcohol and a 'gay party:' A case of rape?

Sept. 30, 2015 - Instinct: Straight Guy Raises Question Of Consent After "Gay Party": Was I Raped? | Instinct

Sept. 30, 2015 - How and why a gay alcoholic gave up drinking at 22

Sept. 30, 2015 - Advocate: Why I Gave Up Drinking at 22 | Advocate.com

Sept. 30, 2015 - Well, now, who didn't see this coming? 'The Simpsons'' Smithers coming out as gay

Sept. 30, 2015 - LGBTQ Nation: Smithers of ‘The Simpsons’ is coming out – LGBTQ Nation

Sept. 30, 2015 - Of gay children and the parents who don't want them

Sept. 30, 2015 - The Good Men Project: Sorry, Kid. Don't Want You. You're Gay. -

Sept. 30, 2015 - New Jersey radio host comes out as gay on air

Sept. 30, 2015 - Queerty: Radio Host Comes Out On Air To Conservative Audience, World Continues Spinning / Queerty

Sept. 30, 2015 - There's more than just one way of getting sober

Sept. 30, 2015 - Psychology Today: Not Just One Way to Get Sober! | Psychology Today

Sept. 30, 2015 - Using forensic science to sexual violence in conflict

Sept. 30, 2015 - The Conversation: Using forensic science to fight back against sexual violence in conflict

Sept. 30, 2015 - How to identify someone at risk for suicide

Sept. 30, 2015 - Psychology Today: How to Identify Someone at Risk for Suicide | Psychology Today

Sept. 30, 2015 - With 37 million scarlet letters, a former porn performer celebrates being bisexual

Sept. 30, 2015 - Huffington Post: 37 Million Scarlet Letters (or, Why I Celebrate Being Bisexual) | Kevin Hogan

Sept. 30, 2015 - Racism in gay porn: Do performers have a race-based 'sexual preference?'

Sept. 30, 2015 - Instinct: Racism In Gay Porn: Can Porn Stars Have A Race Based "Sexual Preference"? | Instinct

Sept. 30, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2015
Today's thought from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

...praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
 -- Second half of Step Eleven


Step Eleven teaches us how to pray. We pray for God's will to replace ours. Our will got us in trouble. God's will guides us to simple serenity. We pray for power to live a spiritual life. This is important, for it takes much strength and courage to live a spiritual life.

The sober path is not always easy. It takes self-discipline. We have to say no to our self-will. We follow God's will for us. The rewards are great. We get sobriety. We get serenity. We get friendship. We regain our family. We get a deep, loving relationship with a Higher Power who wants peace and joy for us and for the world.


Prayer for the Day
Dear Higher Power, I pray the words of Step Eleven. I pray to know Your will for me. And I pray that I have the power to carry out Your will.
Action for the Dayfor the Day
I will examine my life. I will look to see how my will gets in the way of God's will.
You are reading from the book:
Keep It Simple © 1989 by Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 30, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2015


AA Thought for the Day
There are no leaders in AA, except as they volunteer to accept responsibility. The work of carrying on AA - leading group meetings, serving on committees, speaking before other groups, doing twelfth-step work, spreading AA among the alcoholics of the community - all these things are done on a volunteer basis. If I don't volunteer to do something concrete for AA, the movement is that much less effective. I must do my fair share to carry the load. AA depends on all its members to keep it alive and to keep it growing.

Am I doing my share for AA?

Meditation for the Day
When you look to God for strength to face responsibility and are quiet before Him, His healing touch causes the Divine Quiet to flow into your very being. When in weakness you cry to God, His touch brings healing, the renewal of your courage and the power to meet every situation and be victorious. When you faint by the way or are distracted by feelings of inferiority, then rely on the touch of God's spirit to support you on your way. Then arise and go forth with confidence.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may lay myself open today to the healing touch of God. I pray that I may not falter or faint by the wayside, but renew my courage through prayer.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 30, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step
Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2015

"11. - Our relations with the general public should be characterized by personal anonymity. We think AA ought to avoid sensational advertising. Our names and pictures as AA members ought not be broadcast, filmed or publicly printed. Our public relations should be guided by the principle of attraction rather than promotion. There is never need to praise ourselves. We feel it better to let our friends recommend us." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Appendices, "The Twelve Traditions" (long form), p 567.

Today, no "praise" inasmuch as my drinking is concerned, be it years of sobriety or a decision to attend my first meeting tonight. While it is appropriate to give a quick pat on the back for working toward recovery, the overwhelming "credit" belongs to AA without which we have no lifeline to grab and hold onto. If I should boast about my sobriety as my own achievement, if I become complacent in sobriety or if I neglect to do what the program requires I do, I have probably neglected my responsibility to be one of its "success" stories anonymously. Today, I will be stingy in claiming my sobriety as my own accomplishment and instead remember that it's largely the product of AA. And our common journey continues. Step by Step. - Chris M., 2015

Sept. 30, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2015

Reflection for the Day
No matter what other people do or don't do, we have to remain sober and free from other addictions for ourselves. When our program of recovery becomes contingent on the actions or inactions of another person - especially someone with whom we're emotionally involved - the results are invariably disastrous. We need to also remember that intense dislike is as much an emotional involvement as newfound romantic love. In short, we have to cool any risky emotional involvements in the first few months of our recovery, trying to accept the fact that our feelings could change quickly and dramatically. Our watchword must be "First Things First," concentrating on our number one problem before anything else.

Am I building a firm foundation while steering clear of slippery emotional areas?

Today I Pray
May I always remember that healthy relationships with people are necessary for my recovery. But - that substituting an obsession with either a love or hate object is as dangerous to my sell-being as any other addiction.

Today I Will Remember
A dependency is a dependency is a dependency.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 30, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2015

Our AA philosophy is an idealistic philosophy. It has to be in order to be a happy philosophy. Some may declare that it is too much so, that we ignore more materialistic facts. Let us take from our philosophy all the good and the joy it promises. Let us give our gold no acid test.

If our philosophy is unreal and foolish in the eyes of the more materialistic world, then what of it? It enables us to be happier than those that have good sense.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 30, 2015 - Good morning & welcome to what's going to be a Wonderful Wednesday!


Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Sept. 29, 2015 - For African American men, HIV is the perfect storm

Sept. 29, 2015 - Advocate: For Black Gay Men, HIV Is a Perfect Storm | Advocate.com

Sept. 29, 2015 - New tell-all spills the dirt on Faye Dunaway and 'Mommie Dearest'

Sept. 29, 2015 - Out.com: New Tell-All Spills the Dirt About Faye Dunaway and Mommie Dearest! | Out Magazine

Sept. 29, 2015 - A month after Rentboy.com takedown, fear and anger linger in LGBT community

Sept. 29, 2015 - Associated Press: Raid of Rentboy.com by Homeland Security stirs anger – LGBTQ Nation

Sept. 29, 2015 - Obama derides religious freedom as denial of individual rights

Sept. 29, 2015 - Associated Press: Obama: Religious freedom no excuse to deny rights to others – LGBTQ Nation

Sept. 29, 2015: On Danny Pintauro and when to talk to kids about HIV

Sept. 29, 2015 - The Good Men Project: Dad's Hot Topic - On Danny Pintauro and When To Talk With Your Kids About HIV -

Sept. 29, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015
Today's thought from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another.
 -- G. Wilhelm Leibniz


To desire personal happiness is normal and healthy. Most of our plans, choices, and dreams about the present and future regarding jobs, relationships, and hoped-for achievements are geared to make us happy. It's never wrong to want happiness; however, to receive it at someone else's expense or to selfishly steal it from another will result in sorrow. And our greatest happiness will visit us when we least expect it - when we are attentively seeing to another's happiness.

Doing for others - perhaps shopping for a friend who is ill or aged, maybe offering child care to an overworked parent, or cooking a surprise meal for a lonely neighbor - will never fail to heighten our own pleasure.
You are reading from the book:
Worthy of Love by Karen Casey. © 1985 by Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 29, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

The Serenity Prayer
Step by Step
Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015
"12. - ...(W)e of Alcoholics Anonymous believe that the principle of anonymity has an immense spiritual significance. It reminds us that we are to place principles before personalities; that we are actually to practice a genuine humility. This to the end that our great blessings may never spoil us; that we shall forever live in thankful contemplation of Him who presides over us all." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Appendices, "The Twelve Traditions" (long form), pp 567-68.
Today, Traditions 9-12, that anonymity of all those in the program is a principle rather than a courtesy. If we can understand that a principle is an ethic that governs AA, any personal grievances we have become insignificant and futile in the goal of our individual recoveries and the effectiveness of the program as a whole. As the 12th Tradition promises, anonymity has the spiritual power for us to be hungry for "genuine humility," or our desire to know and carry out the will of our higher power as we understand Him  and not our will. Today, I renew my commitment to respect the 12th Tradition and all others as AA's code of ethics. In the process, God granting, may I know the humility of the principle of anonymity and, maybe more, develop a higher sense of responsibility to my sobriety. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2015

Sept. 29, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015

AA Thought for the Day
Having got this far, shall we pause and ask ourselves some searching questions? We need to check up on ourselves periodically. Just how good an AA am I? Am I attending meetings regularly? Am I doing my share to carry the load? When there is something to be done, do I volunteer? Do I speak at meetings when asked, no matter how nervous I am? Do I accept each opportunity to do twelfth-step work as a challenge? Do I give freely of my time and money? Am I trying to spread AA wherever I go? Is my daily life a demonstration of AA principles?

Am I a good AA?

Meditation for the Day
How do I get strength to be effective and to accept responsibility? By asking the Higher Power for the strength I need each day. It has been proved in countless lives that for every day I live, the necessary power shall be given me. I must face each challenge that comes to me during the day, sure that God will give me the strength to face it. For every task that is given me, there is also given me all the power necessary for the performance of that task. I do not need to hold back.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may accept every task as a challenge. I know I cannot wholly fail if God is with me.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 29, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015

Reflection for the Day
In our first weeks or months in The Program, our shaky emotional condition sometimes affects our feelings toward old friends and family. For many of us, these relationships heal quickly in the initial stages of our recovery. For others, a time of "touchiness" seems to persist; now that we're no longer drinking or using other chemicals, we have to sort out our feelings about spouse, children, relatives, employer, fellow workers and even neighbors. Experience in the Program over the years has taught that we should avoid making important decisions early in our recovery - especially emotion-charged decisions about people.

Am I becoming better equipped to relate maturely to other people?

Today I Pray
May God help me through the edginess, the confusion of re-feeling and re-thinking my relationships, the "getting-it-all-together" stages of my recovery. May I not rush into new relationships or new situations that demand an investment of my emotions - not yet.

Today I Will Remember
No entangling alliances too soon.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 29, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015

We members of AA have a tremendous responsibility. We must in our work discuss the most personal matters with the new guy or gal. This information is given us under desperate circumstances and should be treated as most confidential. Carelessness in this respect can and does do a lot of harm at times. Let us confine our conversations with each other to only that part of the new man's problem that pertains to his actual drinking, because that is the only phase of the problem that we can efficiently advise him on, anyway. These personal matters are matters of trust, and they deserve the same confidential treatment as a church confessional.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 29, 2015 - Rise 'n shine for what's going to be a Terrific Tuesday, folks!


Monday, September 28, 2015

Sept. 28, 2015 - Addiction rates run higher among LGBTs than heterosexuals

Sept. 28, 2015 - Advocate: LGBT Addiction Is Not the Same as Straight Addiction | Advocate.com

Sept. 28, 2015 - After all the controversy, 'Stonewall' bombs at the box office

Sept. 28, 2015 - Gay News Network: Stonewall bombs at box office - Gay News Network

Sept. 28, 2015 - Closet case: Former Aussie football player Lachlan Beaton on his private journey to come out as gay

Sept. 28, 2015 - Star Observer: Closet Case: Lachlan Beaton | Star Observer

Sept. 28, 2015 - Eight ways porn can strengthen your relationship - no, really!

Sept. 28, 2015 - The Good Men Project: 8 Ways Porn Can Strengthen Your Relationship -

Sept. 28, 2015 - A bisexual man finds he can be in a monogamous relationship with a woman

Sept. 28, 2015 - The Good Men Project: It Ain't No Lie, Baby -

Sept. 28, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Monday, Sept. 28, 2015
Today's thought from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

Every time I get worried about something I say my prayers more.
 -- Jim Burns


Whether we grew up in religious families or not, most of us seek help from some Greater Power when we're faced with terrifying situations. Often it's at an unconscious level that we ask for extra help. But the fact that we do elicit strength from some source comforts us, and this enables us to walk through the experience that appears so daunting.

We never outgrow the need for strength and comfort. That's good news. It's too awesome to think that we need to know all now, to understand how every detail of living should unfold. It's quite enough to limit our focus on the details of the next 24 hours.

Let's be vigilant about our search for guidance and comfort. And let's not forget that we have to listen for the response. If our minds are filled with worrying, there will be no space for the answers to enter.

Praying for solutions or comfort or just a moment of peace will change my perspective today. When my perspective changes, so do my experiences.
You are reading from the book:
Keepers of the Wisdom © 1996 by Karen Casey

Sept. 28, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step
Monday, Sept. 28, 2015

"1. - Each member of Alcoholics Anonymous is but a small part of a great whole. AA must continue to live or most of us will surely die. Hence our common welfare comes first. But individual welfare follows close afterward." - The First Tradition (long form), Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Appendices, "The Twelve Traditions," p 565.

Today, understand and respect the first Tradition of AA, that I am not first and foremost and that my own sobriety and recovery contribute to the effectiveness of the program as a whole. The sobriety and acceptance for which I have worked are not solely mine but mirror AA's credibility - be it in the eyes of a newcomer or the public and various professional organizations. Because of that responsibility, understand also that the sobriety I have carries a responsibility to it. My responsibility to my sobriety, then, boils down to being in service as the First Tradition dictates. If I can effectively serve, I may be contributing to my own welfare which, as the First Tradition states, comes a close second. Today, my sobriety is not my own and is part of everyone else's, and I am responsible to work for continued recovery. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2015

Sept. 28, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day
Monday, Sept. 28, 2015

AA Thought for the Day
For the past two months we have been studying passages and steps from the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous. Now why not read the book itself again? It is essential that the AA program become part of us. We must have its essentials at our finger tips. We cannot study the Big Book too much or too often. The more we read it and study it, the better equipped we are to think AA, act AA and live AA. We cannot know too much about the program. The chances are that we will never know enough. But we can make as much of it our own as possible.

How much of the Big Book have I thoroughly mastered?

Meditation for the Day
We need to accept the difficulties and disciplines of life so as to fully share the common life of other people. Many things that we must accept in life are not to be taken so much as being necessary for us personally, as to be experienced in order that we may share in the sufferings and problems of humanity. We need sympathy and understanding. We must share many of the experiences of life, in order to understand and sympathize with others. Unless we have been through the same experiences, we cannot understand other people or their makeup well enough to be able to help them.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may accept everything that comes my way as a part of life. I pray that I may make use of it in helping other people.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 28, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Monday, Sept. 28, 2015

Reflection for the Day
Now that we're free from our addictions, living life one day at a time, we can begin to stop making unreasonable demands upon those we love. We can show kindness where we had shown none; we can take the time and initiative to be thoughtful, considerate and compassionate. Even with the people we dislike, we can at least try to be courteous, at times literally going out of our way to understand and help them.

Just for today, will I try to understand rather than be understood, being courteous and respectful to all people with whom I'm in contact?

Today I Pray
May I never forget my old sponge-like self, who soaked up every drop of affection and attention my family or friends could give me, until they were sapped dry. May I learn to be a giver, rather than a constant taker. May I practice offering interest, kindness, consideration and compassion until sensitivity to others becomes second nature to me.

Today I Will Remember
Giving is part of being.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 28, 2015 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener
Monday, Sept. 28, 2015

We have all had the pleasure of knowing intimately several men who might be classed as "Gentlemen of Leisure" and what a squirrel cage they were usually in. They labored all night long to get in jams that required a staff of lawyers all the next day to extricate them.

It takes a big man to make effective use of leisure.

Hazelden Foundation

Sept. 28, 2015 - Rise 'n shine to a Marvelous Monday & greater new week, folks!


Sunday, September 27, 2015

Sept. 27, 2015 - The importance of men loving themselves

Sept. 27, 2015 - The Good Men Project: The Importance of Male Self-Love -

Sept. 27, 2015 - Kim Davis, would you mind terribly and just get lost?

Sept. 27, 2015 - The Good Men Project: Kim Davis, Would You Mind Terribly Just Going Away? -

Sept. 27, 2015 - 'Who's the Boss?' child actor Danny Pintauro discloses HIV+ status

Sept. 27, 2015 - OWN: 'Who's The Boss?' Star Danny Pintauro Reveals He Is HIV-Positive

Sept. 27, 2015 - How 'Stonewall' director Roland Emmerich turned LGBT history into fantasy

Sept. 27, 2015 - Out.com: Straight Outta Stonewall: How Roland Emmerich Turned Gay History into Fantasy | Out Magazine

Sept. 27, 2015 - Pope criticizes religious liberty while sidestepping marriage equality

Sept. 27, 2015 - Associated Press: Pope’s religious liberty speech sidesteps marriage equality – LGBTQ Nation

Sept. 27, 2015 - Work and soul: Finding your path as a man

Sept. 27, 2015 - The Good Men Project: Work and Soul: Finding Your Path As A Man -

Sept. 27, 2015 - One man's life forever changed by being a father - for two hours

Sept. 27, 2015 - The Good Men Project: The Day My Soul Became a Dad For a Few Hours and Never Forgot It -