Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Today, I recognize that I have spent much of my life expecting other people to meet the unrealistic demands and expectations I put on them to fulfill my needs and wants. In selfishness and vanity, I often rejected in anger those who failed or would not give me what I wanted or needed when I wanted or needed it. In those times of looking to the outside for fulfillment, I had not a clue how to look inside myself and beyond something stronger than other people to attain what since have become different needs and expectations. In AA and recovery, I understand now that I put my sobriety first and foremost above everyone and all else to earn acceptance, friendship, love and empathy. And my expectations of others were so unrealistic and selfish that I became needy to the point of being pathetic. Now, in AA and recovery, I see the consequences, sometimes disastrous, of putting all my expectations on others but am able to look inside myself and to a Power stronger than myself to earn what I need. Today, I will take from the reservoir of what AA and recovery have given me to meet my needs and not weigh anyone with expectations so selfish and heavy that I ignore that they, too, have their own needs. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2014
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