July 18, 2018 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step
Wednesday, July 18, 2018

" ...I felt a fear coming into my life, and I couldn't cope with it. I got so that I hid quite a bit of the time, wouldn't answer the phone, and stayed by myself as much as I could. I noticed that I was avoiding all my social friends ...I couldn't keep up with any of my other friends, and I wouldn't go to anyone's house unless I knew they drank as heavily as I did. I never knew it was the first drink that did it. I thought I was losing my mind when I realized that I couldn't stop drinking. That frightened me terribly." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Part II ("Personal Stories)", Ch 2 ("Fear of Fear"), p 324.

TodayI do not have to fear the first drink that unleashes in its wake all its devastation because, today, AA has freed me from fear and all its siblings and cousins. I can claim with honesty that I have fully bowed to Step One - " ...(A)dmitted (I am) powerless ..." - and take as gospel the program's credos like "One Day at a Time," "First Things First," "Keep It Sweet and Simple" and "There for the grace of God go I." I am in recovery, I am sober and I don't need or want the first drink. Without it, I don't have to avoid friends, family or anyone else, and I don't have to be afraid to answer the phone because of some paranoid fear that it's news that I did something last night that I don't remember. Today, I am humble and loyal to the program. With it, fear is knocked out of the ballpark. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2018

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