Tuesday, April 25, 2023
Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
There is luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves, we feel no one else has a right to blame us.
— Oscar Wilde
Just as we don’t have the right to judge someone else, we don’t have the right to judge ourselves. Our addictive script in the past was that when we did something we felt ashamed of, we judged ourselves guilty. All too often, we then punished ourselves.
Was that behavior an expression of our shame and sadness because we’re addicts? Punishing ourselves won’t stop the addiction; loving ourselves will.
We are grateful that our recovery has taught us the difference between guilt and shame. Guilt lets us feel remorse and sadness when our actions violate our values. Guilt helps us know when we’ve acted badly. But shame leaves us hopeless. To give in to shame and self-hatred only harms us and intensifies the power of the addiction. There is a better way, and that’s to learn to love ourselves.
Higher Power, please step in when I feel the urge to take things out on myself. May your love for me teach me to love myself instead.
Hazelden Foundation
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